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Find Your Parenting Style Quiz

If you're curious about this or if you're ready to get get started with My People Patterns, here's an easy way to get into what we have to offer:

1. Parenting Style Quiz - if you know your general approach to parenting, you can begin to understand your relationships with your children.

2. Our New Online Parenting Course - Our parenting course is grounded in Family Systems theory, a branch of family therapy that's focused on improving parent-child dynamics.

3. Test Your Knowledge Of Parenting Types - our new parenting style test will tell you if you're keeping up with the latest parenting trends!

4. Parenting Assessment Guide - when you sign up to our email list either directly, or after choosing to after a quiz, we will email you our 12-page parenting style guide which includes a comprehensive parenting assessment PDF. 

 

 

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Take Our Quiz To Find Your Parenting Style

Growing great relationships with your teen or tween starts with understanding your approach to parenting and how it impacts your family.

Find My Parent Style

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Enroll in our online parenting course

Find out more about our Family Sytems approach to parenting and creating vibrant and healthy parent-child relationships.

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#3 - NEW -

Test Your Parenting Style Knowledge 

Our latest test is for fans of The Parent Test who might want to see if they know their Dolphin Dads from their Free-Range Fathers.

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OTHER PARENTING RESOURCES FROM MY PEOPLE PATTERNS

Our Online Parenting Course: $24.99 $8.99

Take the free parenting style quiz and receive a coupon to get the Introduction to Fortified Relationships for only $8.99  

A Family Systems Informed Parenting Course to Help YouGrow Great Relationships. This course is designed to introduce you to some of the core concepts of family systems, a theory and practice that has been around for decades that helps families become more connected and healthy. . 

FORTIFIED RELATIONSHIPS

- Emotional Communication: Communicate in the way teens need. 

- Chronic Anxiety & Worry: Learn how Chronic Anxiety impacts your parenting style

- Reactive Automatic Behaviors: Understand some of your behaviors and those of your teens.

- Traps & Blocks In Relationships: Understand some of the traps in communication that increase conflict and hurt.

Confused About These Parenting Styles? 

(Don't worry, we were too, that's why we started this)  

My People Patterns has all the info you need to know the differences between your Dolphins from your Drones and your Koala's from the Jellyfish.

Strengthening your relationship with your adolescent is key to providing them with the best possible support. This can be achieved by understanding your approach to parenting and making necessary improvements. Luckily, you can begin this process right away by taking our free parenting style quiz. Not only will this provide you with valuable insights into your parenting style, but it will also equip you with the knowledge and skills to enhance your relationship with your child. Don't miss out on this opportunity to connect with your adolescent on a deeper level and create a more fulfilling family dynamic. Take the quiz today and start building a stronger relationship with your child! 

Take our parenting style quiz below and find out all you need to know about parenting styles and how they impact your teen or tween and your family. When you take the quiz, you are given the option to join our mailing list. We send weekly emails about parenting, parenting styles and more. You'll also be the first to know about our parent and relationship courses which we're currently working on over here. 

 

Take The Parenting Quiz
Skip The Quiz - Just Email Me The Full Parenting Assessment

 

What Are The Different Parenting Styles?

 

12 Parenting Styles - What is Yours?                         

My People Patterns has all the info you need to know the differences between your Dolphins from your Drones and your Koala's from the Jellyfish.                        

Take our parenting style quiz below and find out all you need to know about parenting styles and how they impact your teen or tween and your family. When you take the quiz, you are given the option to join our mailing list. We send weekly emails about parenting, parenting styles and more. You'll also be the first to know about our parent and relationship courses which we're currently working on over here.

                 There seems to be a new parenting term every month that we have to keep up with. If you're worried that you're a Koala Parent or a Helicopter Mom or just want to know what the difference between a Free-range parent and a Nacho Parent is, My People Patterns has the answers to all your parenting style questions.

                       

Take The Parenting Quiz
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Koala Parent

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Jellyfish Parent

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Helicopter Parenting

Coming Soon

 Free-Range Parenting

Read More

Elephant Parent

Coming Soon

Nacho Parent

Coming Soon

 The Lighthouse Parent

Read More

Commando Parenting

Read More

Dolphin Parent

Coming Soon

Wabi-Sabi Parent

Coming Soon

 The Tiger Parent Style 

Read More

  The Snow Plow Parent

Read More

The Parent Test On

ABC  HULU.

                  

 

The Parent Test on ABC/HULU is a fascinating look inside the lives of real family's who have self-identified their parenting style. Each week, four of the families s are put through the test with two different scenarios, filmed in and around the families’ homes. fter watching the videos, the parents in the back row comment and vote on which parenting style they found to be the most effective; eventually, the “most effective” style of parenting will be put through to the semi-final.

As a family systems therapist and occasional professor to grad-school students, this insight and live footage of parenting in action is unpresedenxted. I have a feeling clip of this will be shown as parenting examples in action for years to come in Developmental Psych classes across the globe!

 

Parenting Styles Examples :

The Free-Range Parents Or New Age

 

The Tiger Parents In Action

 

The Helicopter Parenting

 

Free-Range Parenting & Anxiety

 

What Is A Parenting Style Anyway?

Parenting Style is just the term that psychologists and mental health professionals use to coin the overall approach an individual has to being a parent, what strategies they use, and what their approach to being a caregiver is. Part of our understanding of child development comes from observations of children with and without their parents, and one of the main breakthroughs was an understanding that, in general, children could be could into categories based on how they behaved around their parents. When this was studied more, it turned out that how the parents were interacting with their children or their style of parenting was the number one predictor of which category these children would fall into. 

Watch The Video

 

The Four Dials Of Parenting.

Parenting is usually and most recently conceptualized by two dimensions which are shown on an axis, this is, parental acceptance & involvement, and on the other axis, strictness-supervision. This creates a quadrant from which the four types of parenting styles of authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and neglectful are created.

If you go a little further back in the history books, these two axis were condensed from other dimensions, and sort of squished four separate ideas together. I call these the Four Dials of parenting, and I think they're useful because the variations on four dials create an infinite number of combinations of parenting styles. I find this super helpful to understand any new parenting term that comes our way.   

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WARMTH

The first dial is about emotional nutrition - how warmth and love for the child is expressed. At the low end of the dial, there's anger, hostility and apathy. Parents can slide up and down the scale depending on the situation. 

ACCEPTANCE

This dial is the second component of the 'Responsiveness' Scale, and is about how much the parent's accept their child, their child's feelings and behaviors. At the low end of this dial is rejection and neglect. 

CONTROL OF BEHAVIORS

All infants need help controlling their behaviors - it's how we learn not to touch the hot oven or to hit people. As the child matures, the child needs less control of their behaviors.

CONTROL OF AUTONOMY

Babies are literally helpless when they are born and rely on us for everything. As they mature, they need less help and start wanting to be separate from their caregivers.  This is autonomy. 

What Is My Parenting Style?

And Do Parenting Styles Matter?

 

Parenting styles can have a big impact on a child's development, some styles are more authoritarian, which meaning that the child is told what to do and how to do it. As you can imagine, this will impact a child differently from a more relaxed or warm approach. Other parenting styles are more permissive, which means that the child is allowed to make their own decisions with few expectations or consequences. Permissive styles are thought to be good for children because it allows them to learn from their mistakes. However, it can also lead to children not feeling responsible for their actions. It is important for parents to find a style of parenting that works well for them and their children.

Take The Parenting Style Quiz
Skip The Quiz - Just Email Me The Parenting Assessment

What Is Tiger Parenting? 

 

Tiger parenting, also known as "authoritative parenting," is a style of parenting that is characterized by high expectations, strict rules and discipline, and a focus on achievement and success. Tiger parents push their children to excel academically and in other areas, and may use punishment or negative consequences to enforce rules and encourage compliance.

                                                                 

Research on the effects of tiger parenting has been mixed. Some studies have found that children of tiger parents tend to have higher academic achievement and success in school. For example, a study published in the Journal of Child Development found that Chinese-American children of tiger parents had higher grades and test scores than children of other parenting styles. But the studies are not all positive. 

                                     

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What Is The Impact Of Tiger Parenting?

 

 

 

 

 

Doan, S. N., Tardif, T., Miller, A., Olson, S., Kessler, D., Felt, B., & Wang, L. (2016, May 4). Consequences of ‘tiger’ parenting: a cross-cultural study of maternal psychological control and children’s cortisol stress response. Developmental Science20(3), e12404. https://doi.org/10.1111/desc.12404

Tiger Parenting Break-Down

The Tiger Parent is characterized by an intense focus on achievement and success. 

Tiger Parenting and The Four Dials.

Translated to The Four Dials of parenting, we would imagine high levels of control.

The Parenting Quadrant

The Tiger Parent is more akin to Authoritative Parenting if you look through the lens of the four quadrants. 

What Is Free-Range Parenting?

                                                             

The term Free-Range Parenting was made famous in 2008 after an article in The New York Sun went viral about a Mom who let her 9 year old ride the subway alone in NYC. At face value, that's pretty shocking, but digging deeper the reasoning was sound and based in reality. The decision was made together as a family, there was lots of discussion around it, there were safety plans and it was well thought out, so in theory, this was done in the most appropriate way I can think of. The results? Well, she reported them to be a,self-reliant, less anxious, more confident kid.

The key principle of free-range parenting is that children should be allowed to take on age-appropriate challenges and responsibilities and to make their own decisions within limits set by their parents. 

This means that free range parents might allow their children to walk to school or the park on their own, or to make their own snack choices within certain guidelines 

 

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 The Benefits of Free-Range Parenting

There are definitely some benefits of free-range parenting, including helping children develop self-reliance, independence, and problem-solving skills. 

 If done properly, there are benefits around parents teaching the importance of personal responsibility and safety.

Because there’s an emphasis on personal choice, the role that parents play in the limits and boundaries they set for their children are much more clear and defined.

Free-Range Parenting Break-Down

The key principle of free-range parenting is that children should be allowed to take on age-appropriate challenges and responsibilities, and to make their own decisions within the limits set by their parents. 

Tiger Parenting and The Four Dials.

Translated to The Four Dials of parenting, we would imagine low levels of 'control o behavior' as well as low levels of 'control of autonomy' as both of these dials are about 'freedom' in a basic way. 

Translating The Parenting Quadrant

The Free-Range Parent is more akin to Permissive Parenting, if you look through the lens of the four quadrants. This suggests low levels of control but lots of love and acceptance.  

What Is Jellyfish Parenting?

ourtney Kardashian has recently grabbed headlines for her bizarre parenting methods, which some have labeled as "koala parenting." What most people don't know is that Koala Parenting is JUST for newborn babies, after a certain age, this turns into Jellyfish Parenting. What is jellyfish parenting? Well in this video we will explore what it is, the impacts and what to do about it.

 Jellyfish parenting is not necessarily bad parenting, but it does have an impact according to research on a child's development. Find out what in this video.                              

       

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Tiger Parenting Break-Down

The Tiger Parent is characterized by an intense focus on achievement and success. 

Tiger Parenting and The Four Dials.

Translated to The Four Dials of parenting, we would imagine high levels of control.

The Parenting Quadrant

The Tiger Parent is more akin to Authoritative Parenting if you look through the lens of the four quadrants. 

                                                                                

Helicopter Parenting

Nacho Parenting is described in the parenting video here, and there will be more to follow soon. Sign up for our mailing list by taking The Parenting Style Quiz above.

Tiger Parenting Break-Down

The Tiger Parent is characterized by an intense focus on achievement and success. 

Tiger Parenting and The Four Dials.

Translated to The Four Dials of parenting, we would imagine high levels of control.

The Parenting Quadrant

The Tiger Parent is more akin to Authoritative Parenting if you look through the lens of the four quadrants. 

What Is Lighthouse Parenting?  

The lighthouse is a stable solid structure on the coast, that your child can find at day or night to work out where home is and to measure how far out they have sailed. The lighthouse can warn about rocks and dangers under the ocean, but the lighthouse parent is fixed in place, it can't swim out to see and take over the sailing as another parenting style might.  The lighthouse parent trusts that the child is figuring out how to sail the ship of their life the best they can and that they will return to the coast when they need to. Until they're ready to return, the lighthouse parents remain a solid fixture on the horizon, shining a light and welcoming their children back whenever they're ready to return.

                                          

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The Lighthouse Parent

A lighthouse parent is exemplifying a parenting approach that is akin to modern leadership roles.  - Modern leaders can inspire, motivate, support, and guide - which is different from a manager who will remind your of rules and set your key performance indicators for the month. 

The lighthouse parent emodies a style of parenting that conveys the best of what is known about a balanced parenting style. From decades of research we know that a balanced parenting style is correlated to better academic performance, lower anxiety, lower depression, less substance use and even stronger relationships as young adults.

 

Lighthouse Parenting Break-Down

The Lighthouse Parent is a term coined by Dr. Kenneth Ginsburg in his book “ Raising Kids to Thrive.” It is characterized by balance, insight and care. 

Tiger Parenting and The Four Dials.

Lighthouse Parents have their four dials at the higher end of each. They are able to slide up and down the scales to fit the situation and needs. 

The Parenting Quadrant

The Lighthouse Parent scores highly in each of the four dials which makes it equivalent to Authoritative Parenting. This is associated with raising successful and balanced kids with a secure attachment. 

 

What Is Commando Parenting?

Commando parenting is a style that emphasizes discipline and structure, this approach is characterized by a no-nonsense attitude where parents set clear boundaries and expect their children to follow them. I’m a family systems therapist and recognize this term made popular by Dr Phil as a classic structural family systems technique. Is this radical maneuver an actual parenting style though?

                                  

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What Is Koala Parenting?

Koala parenting is a type of parenting that is often linked with Attachment Theory, but is not technically any part of modern attachment theory. Koala Parenting is confusingly also known as attachment parenting and is a parenting style that focuses on providing a secure and stable environment for children. There's no direct evidence it promotes healthy or secure attachment though. So whether you're new to parenting or you've been parenting for years, and want to know if you're a Koala Parent ... this video is a must-watch! We'll learn about the basics of koala parenting and why it is such a successful parenting style.                              

     

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What Is Snowplow Parenting?

                           

You might be more familiar with snowplow parenting from celebs who have made the news in recent years. In March 2019, dozens of parents, including actresses Lori Loughlin and Felicity Huffman, were arrested and charged with conspiracy to commit mail fraud and are the most infamous of snowplow parents. The snowplow parent is the type of parent who won't let things stand in the way of getting their child what their child wants or needs, Just as a snowplow removes snow and ice from the road, the snowplow parent removes obstacles that get in the way of their child’s success.In this video, i give examples of snowplow parenting from my clinical experience, break down some of the patterns of this parenting style and tell you about the issues that come with being a snowplow parent.

                           

                

                           

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The Parenting Style Quiz From My People Patterns

My People Patterns aims to help parents grow great relationships with their children, particularly teens and tweens. We believe that knowing your parenting style can be the start of that journey to improve, heal or fortify that relationship, because 'parenting style' is just how we describe an approach to the relationship you have to being a parent.

What Parenting Style Am I? Find Out Now!

The My People Patterns PArenting Style Quiz will give you your top three answers which is helpful because in different situations you might respond differently in others. If you make sure to enter your email address when you get the results, we'll be able to tell you a bit more about the free online parenting course we just launched. 

 

The Impact Of Parenting Style On Teens

Parenting styles refer to the way in which parents behave and interact with their children. According to child psychologists, there are two main aspects of parenting that can influence child development, an emotional component and a behavioral component.

Parenting styles and techniques have been studied for decades and there's now a vast body of literature that looks at the impact of parenting. It has consistently been shown that parenting style can relate to various outcomes such as child psychological problems such as aggression and academic performance. Parenting has also been found to influence more nuanced qualities, such as academic achievement and the quality of relationships.

 

The Impact Of Tiger  Parenting

- Increased cortisol levels in youth.  (Doan et al., 2016)

- Positively and significantly associated with child anxiety (Tam et al., 2018)

This style is also high in control, but low in warmth. Authoritarian parents are strict and believe in punishment and discipline, and they do not consider their children's emotions or allow for negotiation. Children raised by authoritarian parents may be obedient and respect authority, but they may also have low self-esteem and struggle with communication and relationships.

The Impact Of Permissive Parenting

This style is low in control and high in warmth. Permissive parents are lenient and forgiving, and they act more like friends to their children than authority figures. Children raised by permissive parents may lack self-control, consideration for others, and motivation for achievement. They may also be more likely to experiment with drugs or alcohol.

The Impact Of Uninvolved Parenting

  1. This style is low in both control and warmth. Uninvolved parents show little interest in their children's lives and may be neglectful or rejecting when their children seek help. Children raised by uninvolved parents may struggle in school, have difficulty forming friendships, and have high levels of depression, anxiety, and drug use.

 
 
 

 

How Parenting Styles & Types  Impact Teens' Mental Health

Parenting styles, personality types and teen mental health all play a role. Parenting styles vary from authoritarian to permissive and everything in between. Personality types and teen mental health are also important factors to consider when attempting to understand your teen’s needs and behaviors. Parenting styles, personality types, teen mental health and their impact on one another are complex relationships that often go unnoticed by parents until they’re no longer able to influence their child’s behavior or mood through regular parental interaction. Understanding these relationships is the first step towards effectively helping your child before the problems become unmanageable.

The Importance of Parenting Styles

Parenting styles are important because they can impact Teen mental health. Parenting styles can be described as authoritarian, permissive and everything in-between. The different parenting styles have a direct impact on the psychological development of a child. A strict authoritarian style of parenting can be very beneficial for children who are struggling with anxiety or depression. This parenting style is characterized by high expectations and a high level of punishment when those expectations are not met. A demanding permissive style of parenting is great for children who struggle with strong willedness and lack self-control; the child learns that without supervision, he’ll get away with anything. Finally, there are many types of parenting styles that fall somewhere in between these two extremes. A supportive, authoritative style is best for children struggling with low self-esteem or self-worth.

Differences Between Parenting Styles

There are many different parenting styles. These include authoritarian, permissive, authoritative and neglectful. Authoritarian parents believe that they have the right to make all of the decisions for their children and will use physical discipline or punishment to enforce these rules. Permissive parents are more accepting of their children's choices and allow them greater independence, but also provide negative consequences if they make poor choices. Authoritative parents are a combination of authoritarian and permissive parenting styles and act as a third party in the decision-making process by only giving advice when asked. Neglectful parents do not take an active role in guiding their children’s behavior.

How authoritarian parenting affects teen mental health

Authoritarian parenting is a style that puts emphasis on rules, control, and conformity. This style of parenting can be beneficial to some teens because it provides structure and encourages responsibility. However, this style can also be emotionally damaging because the teen is often forced to act in a certain way without being able to express their emotions or needs.

How permissive parenting affects teen mental health

Research has shown that permissive parenting style is associated with poorer mental health among adolescents, specifically depression and anxiety. Teenagers who are raised by permissive parents may feel too free in the world, which can lead to mental health problems such as depression and anxiety. Permissive parents may also unintentionally overindulge their children, giving them everything they need when they’re not yet ready for it. If your teen exhibits signs of depression or anxiety, talk to your doctor about whether you should be more restrictive in terms of what your child does and where your teen goes. For instance, if your child is exhibiting antisocial behavior or cutting themselves, you might consider restricting their activities a little bit more than you normally would. The same could be said for curfews and chores.

Parenting Styles and Teen Mental Health

One of the most important factors to consider when looking at parenting styles and teen mental health is the nature of how parents interact with their children. This can be seen through a parenting style that is authoritative, permissive or authoritative-permissive. Authoritative parents are strict but supportive and have high expectations for the child’s behavior. Permissive parents are more lenient and aren’t concerned with how their child behaves. The authoritarian parent has very high standards but also allows some freedom while being in charge of all aspects of the child's life. A sense of security, consistency and trust with a parent are all positive aspects that contribute to good mental health when it comes to parenting styles and teen mental health. For teens who don’t have a strong sense of security or consistency within their families, they may struggle with mental health issues such as depression or anxiety because they lack these things in their lives.

How you as a parent raise your teenager can have a huge impact on their mental health. Understanding the different types of parenting styles and how they affect teen mental health can help you raise your teenager in a way that is most healthy for them.

 

 

 

 
 

The Parenting Style Test -

How Well Do You Know Your Parenting Styles?

This fun test will guide you through eight questions to grill your knowledge on parenting styles and parenting types. It's a multiple-choice visual test that is eight questions long. Find out if you're going to give Supernanny a run for her money by taking the test now.